
Deception Tip 61:
Liars will often hold their breath as the target guesses the possible answers. Then exhale the instant the target guesses correctly.
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Podcast Transcript
Hello and welcome to the Deception Tips podcast, where you will learn amazing cues to detect deceit that will help you read people like never before. Iโm your host Spencer Coffman, letโs get started.
Welcome to episode 61 of the Deception Tips podcasts. Weโve been through a few episodes that weโre really recapping of a lot of previous episodes, weโre starting a big project of tying everything together, weโre inventing clusters and patterns of behaviors. Weโre not really inventing them, weโre putting them together so that you can better recognize and see these individual signs of deception.
Weโre also relating all of these signs to previous signs so that you can start to form a bigger understanding, youโre getting a complete picture. Youโre putting that puzzle together, youโre seeing every last piece and how they fit together perfectly. So, here we go, last time, we spoke of a sign of deception that was related to the one before and related to a whole bunch of them prior to that.
We talked about how confident people tend to dominate the space they occupy. This is something that is common sense, but most people havenโt really stopped to think about it as is most common-sense stuff. So, when people are confident in what they believe, in what theyโre saying, in what theyโre doing, they are taking control of the space in which they are presiding.
So, they are using their hands, theyโre using gestures, theyโre occupying their entire personal bubble. They may even be walking around the stage or walking around their area, shuffling back and forth, leaning in and out. Theyโre hustling, theyโre moving, theyโre jiving, theyโre bobbing and weaving, theyโre pouring out their passion for whatever it is theyโre talking about.
Their whole body is involved in what they are saying, they are fully committed to whatever it is that they are saying. Itโs important to them, it means a lot and they want to share it with you. Youโll notice, sometimes when I really start getting into the deception tips or whatever Iโm saying, my voice will get faster, it will rise, itโll feel a little bit more intense, almost like somethingโs coming up.
Thatโs because youโre hearing my passion for this topic, youโre hearing it, youโre understanding it, you are beginning to feel it. Itโs taking control of your body almost, itโs like a flow or a flood when I speak and it just pushes through and all of a sudden, youโre like, whoa man, this guy is intense or itโs too much, or whatever you may feel.
Sometimes when you see other people interact with people and they are really pushing it on you, you may feel like theyโre shoving it down your throat because theyโre so intense, theyโre so passionate about it. They havenโt learned to tone it down to make it presentable so that other people will hear and listen to what theyโre saying, thatโs the key.
So, if you are one of those people who are very intense and you really have a lot of passion about whatever youโre saying and youโre so excited all the time about whatever it is youโre talking about, then maybe you need to tone it down a little bit so that other people will listen to you and hear what youโre saying.
Anyway, thatโs what we spoke about, confident people dominate the space in which they occupy, opposite that, liars tend to reduce their space, conceal because they want to hide. Theyโre hiding the truth, so theyโre also going to hide their body because they donโt want other people to see whatโs going on unconsciously. They donโt want those signs of leakage to be witnessed by anyone who knows what they mean.
In reality, a lot of people donโt know what they mean, however, this podcast, the Deception Tips book, the Deception Tips Revised and Expanded book, the Guide to Deception Book, the deception tips videos, the deception tips blog, and the deception tips website, all hope to change that. I want a lot of people to know how to read others and detect deception so that they will never be taken advantage of by lies again.
So, here we go, weโve got a good tip coming up today, itโs one thatโs related to an old tip, we had that before. This one is a tactic that targets can use, so the person interrogating the liar can use this to help figure out the truth by suggesting things or guessing things and reading the body language of the liar or the person withholding information.ย
They can do this in order to get that information from the liar without letting the liar speak, theyโll be guessing the answers and reading the body language, and finding the correct answer to whatever it is.
Here we go, deception tip Number 61. Liars will often hold their breath as the target guesses the possible answers, then exhale the instant the target guesses correctly. Here it is again, deception tip number 61. Liars will often hold their breath as the target guesses the possible answers, then exhale the instant the target guesses correctly.
So, what does this look like? Well, itโs really very simple, sometimes it may even be hard to see. Itโs not like the liar is going to be holding their breath like in the cartoons with their big cheeks puffed out like a pufferfish or a blowfish, holding them, pursing their lips, that kind of a thing.ย
This may be a silent breath-hold, almost like when someone is playing poker and theyโre making a bluff, and when they bluff, theyโre seeing whether or not someone is going to pass or call or fold or whatever.
They may hold their breath for that little instant and then as soon as the person says, I fold, boom, they exhale a release like itโs an exhale of relief. So, thatโs how it looks, it may be very, very difficult to see.ย
However, if youโre watching them, you will most likely see them freeze and with the freezing, theyโll be holding their breath. So, we watch their chest, watch their diaphragm, watch their throat because thatโs where youโre going to see these signs of breathing.
Their shoulders may also be a good one because sometimes when people breathe, their shoulders move up and down a little bit with their breathing, so pay attention to their normal behavior first.ย
Remember, it is very, very important that you establish a baseline behavior before you start detecting any signs of deception. You need to know exactly how that person behaves when theyโre normal before you can start to see how they behave when theyโre stressed.
Lie detectors do this with the lie-detecting machines, they have the controlled questions, were you born here, do you work here, is your hair this, are you wearing a white shirt? Those questions are control questions to develop the baseline behavior so that they can determine how someone responds when theyโre stressed compared to when theyโre normal.
Now, chances are, if youโre speaking to someone directly, theyโre probably stressed anyway, but get an idea of this before you start testing it out so you can see the change in their breathing. Itโs also related to another sign, I mentioned it a little bit ago, probably about 30 seconds ago with the freezing.
Iโm going to tell you a lot more about that, and how it relates to that sign. We had this tip quite a while ago, hopefully, you remember it, if not, pay attention to the break but use the time of the break to try to jog your memory and see if you can remember what tip it was, the answer will be coming up right after this.
How would you like to really know what every body is saying? Understanding body language can help you in your career, your relationships, and everyday interactions. Get Spencer Coffmanโs โA Guide to Deceptionโ online today.
Welcome back to deception tip episode number 61 we are talking about a behavior that the target or the person being lied to, the person doing the interrogating, can do in order to find out the truth without the liar even talking, without them speaking. Theyโre going to find the truth by only reading their body language and this is guessing answers.
They will guess the proper answers or potential answers and when they find the right one, the liar may hold their breath for a split second and then release it afterward as a relief, kind of like, ah, now I donโt have to lie about it. So, we mentioned right before the break that it is related to another sign, another deception tip that we had, and we had it 40 episodes ago.
So, this is convenient, if you remember it, last week we had a deception tip reminder that happened 20 times ago with the โdominate spaceโ and the โtake up space.โ That was episode 40, episode 60, so now here we are, it’s episode 61, the one that happened before was episode 21 and it was about โsuggesting answersโ. So, this one is โguessing answersโ, that one was โsuggesting answersโ.
Now, this was when a target suggests the correct answer, a liarโs face will freeze for a split second, just like a deer in the headlights, and their eyes will be open and surprise.ย
Their jaw may drop a little bit in an o shape, like, oh my goodness and they will be dumbfounded that the target knew exactly what the correct answer was without even them telling it or without speaking to them about it.
So, theyโre very similar, episode 61 today adds the fact that hey, in addition to that, you may see them hold their breath or you may not even see that other stuff, you may only see them hold their breath. So, you need to pay attention to both of these, 21, 61, suggesting answers, guessing answers, they go hand in hand.
So, if you donโt remember episode 21 then I highly encourage you to go back, and listen to the podcast, itโs only 15 minutes guys, listen to it. You can listen to it at double speed if you want, cut it down to seven and a half minutes, no problem, double speed, listen to it. Then check out the deception tips video on it because there you will get even more information, itโs only five minutes, and youโve got the time.
You can even do it in the car while you listen to it, just get that information, episode 21 because itโs hand in hand with this one. Any time a target can suggest or guess the potential outcomes of the situation, the potential answers.ย
Now, weโre not talking big long answers, most likely this is going to be like a list of names or locations. Where did you hide my keys? Letโs see, are they in the microwave? Then youโre going to watch the person, maybe theyโre in the plants, maybe theyโre in here.
Obviously, youโre not going to go through every single hiding place in the house, you need to have a pretty good narrowed-down list. Maybe they tell you, all right, itโs in one of these 20 locations or one of these 10 locations, then you can look at them and be like, well, I know this person, Iโve studied their behavior.ย
Typically, when youโre in this situation, whether itโs in real life, as in a common situation with people you know, a household, youโre going to know that person.
If itโs in like a police interrogation type or criminal situation, chances are the law enforcement, theyโve already studied the behavior of whomever they are interrogating, so they know a little bit about them. So, they can take a look at this list and be like, well, this oneโs too far from home, we know his profile.ย
This one, itโs not like his personality to go here, so they can take that list of maybe 20, narrow it down, you can get a 10-item list or so, and then somebody who can read body language can just go right in there.
Maybe they would even have someone else ask these questions or guess these answers while the person who can read people will sit and watch them only. Watch the interrogatee only, the person under suspicion, the person whoโs being questioned. Theyโll watch their body language as someone else, maybe a prompter or an aide reads off, is at such and such place? Is it here? Is it at this location?
Theyโll watch the person and they will see if they freeze, if their mouth drops open, if their eyes widened in surprise, if they hold their breath and go on like that. Now, itโs not a rapid-fire technique, itโs not, all right, is it at Main Street?ย
Is it at Broadway? Is it here? No, itโs slower because you need to give them a little bit of time to transition and you need to make it seem like they are giving educated guesses, not just going at random down a list.
So, theyโd say, โWell, I know where you hid it, you hid it at this location, itโs at the basement of this warehouseโ and then, okay, nothing. โOkay, no, I know exactly where it is, I know you, that would be a decoy you would use, this is where you probably really hid it. Itโs in the basement of your grandmotherโs house, I know thatโs where it is.โ
Then they see, nope, okay, no, Iโm just messing with you, and theyโd just go on and down the row and hit them all and watch as the person gives those signs of deception leakage. One thing thatโs important is, we talked about this long ago, this was episode number 19, if you remember, it’s contempt.ย
When you are guessing these answers, if you are way off or if youโre guessing incorrect answers, you may very well see contempt come across the personโs face or even a little bit of a smile or happiness, like duping delight.
We talked about that a couple of times before, theyโre going to be happy youโre on the wrong track. Then when you get to the right place, you may also see anger because theyโre mad that you have discovered where they have hidden it. So, pay attention to those because if you see a little bit of the contempt, that duping delight, or a little bit of the anger in it, then maybe you have found the incorrect and the correct answers.
So, pay attention to these because they can help you, they do work, it is real science, itโs not fake. Listen to the rest of these episodes and everything else, combine all of your knowledge so that you can be a lie-detecting machine.
I want to thank you for listening to the Deception Tips podcast. I hope that youโll share it with your friends, subscribe to the feed, check out the deception tips videos, the deception tips blog, and take a look at the books I have available as always, tune in next week for a new deception tip.
Video Transcript
Hey guys, my name is Spencer Coffman, thank you for watching theย deception tips videos, theyโre all about teaching you how to read people and detect deception so that you will be able to tell if someone is lying to you. Today, we are going to talk about a tactic that you can use when you are speaking with other people when youโre trying to find out a specific answer to something, something that you can do in an effort to trip them up and catch them in whatever theyโre doing.
We talked about something similar to this a long time ago, 40 videos ago, number 21, it was on Suggesting or Guessing Answers, very similar to this one. We said that when you are trying to get these answers out of people that they may look like a deer in the headlights. Their mouth may be in an O shape, theyโll be surprised, and they may hold their breath for a split second, again, thatโs related to this one.
So, here it is, this is deception tip number 61. Liars will often hold their breath as the target guesses the possible answers then exhale the instant the target guesses correctly. Again, we talked about this in number 21, Suggesting Answers and this one is very similar. Last time, we spoke about how they would hold their breath, they might be surprised, their mouth would be caught in an O shape.
Also, that deer in the headlights look like theyโre, โOh my gosh, how did you knowโ. So, this tip is very similar in that instead of suggesting possible answers this one youโre a little bit more certain you are starting to guess the most likely outcomes of whatever it is youโre trying to find.
So, if you want to know where they hid something and youโve narrowed it down to certain areas and youโre starting to really hone in on it, now youโre going to watch that person and look for these behaviors. Look for the holding of the breath, youโre going to look for surprise, like โWow, I canโt believe you got thatโ.
Obviously, unless they are playing a game with you and they are going to reveal the answer to you like some sort of a magic trick or they hid your keys and youโre going to guess where they are theyโre not going to be like, โOh my goodness, you got it right, how did you do that?โ Most of the time in this situation when youโre trying to find this information, they are going to withhold it from you, they are lying to you.
So, youโre going to guess these answers and theyโre not going to tell you what the right answer is, so you need to know based on their body language and how they react. Theyโre going to react in different ways, there are their breathing patterns, their eyes, remember the holding of their breath, things like that. You may also see the surprise, you could also see a little bit of anger if theyโre upset that you got the correct answer.
So, watch out for those and keep in mind that as youโre guessing these answers you might see other signs. If youโre way off and youโre in the complete other room and they hid something in the living room and youโre guessing all these other rooms or whatever the scenario may be then they may show signs of happiness that youโre on the wrong track or maybe theyโre even going to show a little bit of contempt.
Remember we talked about that in deception tip number 19, how if they are feeling like youโre going down the wrong path they may be a little contemptuous towards you like โHa-ha, Iโm smarter than you, youโll never get itโ, theyโll show that type of a thing. Then as you start coming back towards the right path, when youโre getting warmer and not colder, they may start to show those signs of anger or unhappiness that youโre getting close to where they have it hidden and then when you find out theyโre going to be shocked, surprised, etc.
On the other hand, it could also be a form of relief like you may also have that holding of breath and then theyโll let it go and they could be relieved that they didnโt have to tell you. Maybe the situation is something where youโre trying to get them to rat out someone or turn on somebody or tell you the story which could implicate someone they were working with, a friend or whatever.
If you guess the scenario and then all they have to do is be like okay that was it now there may be that relief that they didnโt have to be the one to tell you. Obviously, you got it from them, but they didnโt speak it to you, so thereโs that internal feeling there. So, keep that in mind, pay attention, watch for those signs and those patterns and clusters all related around that when youโre trying to find the truth.
So, if this is your first time watching these videos, Iโd love to have youย subscribe to the channel on YouTube, feel free to comment with any questions as well. Also, if youโd like more information,ย there are books,ย blog posts, andย podcastsย all available onย spencercoffman.comย that are dedicated to teaching you exactly what every body is really saying.
Until next time.