
Deception Tip 91:
Ask for information when people are hungry. Hunger can lead to impatience and impulsive responses, which may be more truthful.
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Podcast Transcript
Hello and welcome to the Deception Tips podcast where you will learn amazing cues to detect deceit that will help you read people like never before. Iโm your host Spencer Coffman, letโs get started.
Hello and welcome to episode 91 of the Deception Tips podcast. Last week, we talked about an important tip, about getting facts wrong and how you can use getting things incorrect to your advantage.ย
Now, that doesnโt mean that you think that they are wrong, you are doing something where youโre pretending to have the story wrong.
You know what the truth is, you know what you understand but you are going to misinterpret or put a different light on some facts or different parts of their story in an effort to get them to be a little bit more frustrated.ย
Theyโre going to feel like they have to correct you, they want to tell you the truth. Remember, itโs important to do this with people who are showing you signs of confidence, overconfidence, superiority, or pride.
Theyโre leaning back in their chair, their feet are up, maybe theyโre steepling their fingers, they have their hands behind their head. Different behaviors that show you that they think theyโre superior, that theyโve started to fool you, that they are about to get away with their lie. You can become a little bit of a nitwit or an inspector Clouseau and you can ask them different questions.
Say, okay, I think I understand, and give them their story and screw up on a few key details or add something in that doesnโt belong. Say they went somewhere they didnโt or at a different time, screw up on some of those things and they will feel like they need to correct you.
Obviously, itโs not going to happen all the time but some of the time it will. When they correct you, youโre going to be able to see the different holes in their stories or the different contradictions.ย
Youโll be able to watch their body language again in that area. So, make sure you mess up on the spots that you are pretty sure theyโre lying about to try to get them to show you some more unconscious signs of deception.
Thereโs a big battle going on between the conscious and the unconscious and when you start to do things like this, theyโre already a little bit frustrated and tense. Now youโre pushing them off the cliff or youโre poking them with a needle to get them closer and closer to the edge.ย
They will eventually snap or blow up or somethingโs going to happen where you will receive a big outburst of different information and facts, hopefully, it becomes to be the truth.
So, that is exactly what we talked about last week. If you didnโt listen to the episode, I encourage you to do so. I also encourage you to check out the video for a little quick five-minute recap. Itโs not even a recap, itโs an entirely different speech, audio or visual, or talk on this topic.
Today, weโre talking about a deception tip that is one that youโve no doubt experienced yourself. Itโs actually a play on a feeling and itโs always going to work on everybody. Just like all of these other tips, theyโre universal but this one is even more so because this is a feeling that everybody experiences. Every single person in the world experiences this exact same feeling.
Iโm not talking about a feeling like sadness or love or happiness or anything like that because believe it or not, there are some rare cases of people that may never really experience those or one of them.ย
If they do, they may experience them in a different way than someone else. However, this is the exact same, itโs the exact same across everybody. If youโve read the title you know what this feeling is, this feeling is hunger.
Everyone has been hungry at some point in his or her life. I donโt mean hungry as in starving, I mean like between lunch and supper, all of a sudden, your stomach is growling and youโre hungry.ย
What usually happens when you get hungry, is a lot of people start to become a little bit angry or irritable, they also may become impatient or tense. Remember what happens when people tell a lie, theyโre stressed and tense because of the battle going on between the conscious and the unconscious.
So, if theyโre hungry, that goes up, even more, theyโre going to be even more stressed and tense. Therefore, speaking to someone when he or she is hungry can either be really helpful or really negative.ย
Either theyโre going to help you and just tell it to get it out so they can eat or theyโre not going to tell you anything because theyโre hungry and theyโre irritated and upset.
So, here it is, this is Deception Tip number 91. Ask for information when people are hungry. Hunger can lead to impatience and impulsive responses which may be more truthful. Here it is again, Deception Tip number 91. Ask for information when people are hungry. Hunger can lead to impatience and impulsive responses which may be more truthful.
So, as I said, when people are hungry, they are not thinking as clearly as they would be when theyโre full. Theyโre usually focused on finding something to eat or on their stomach, theyโre thinking about their hunger, they are hungry, they want to satisfy that hunger. Therefore, when you are asking them for information, they are really thinking about your answers.
Theyโre not thinking about their response fully, theyโre not fully thinking about it, so if theyโre lying and theyโre being deceptive, that requires a lot of thought. They need to keep the lie straight, they need to make sure they tell it the same every single time. They also need to make sure that they are using the same words, and the same sentences. All this stuff goes into telling their lie over and over for other people to hear it.
When theyโre hungry, they may not be thinking as much about their lie because they are thinking about their hunger, they want to eat. Therefore, if you start asking people more information when theyโre hungry, they may be more apt to tell you the truth because theyโre not thinking about their lie, theyโre going to slip up. Of course, itโs not always, but itโs a good chance.
In addition, when people are hungry, they also may become angry. Thereโs a very famous commercial out there, โhungry, grab aโฆโ you know what it is. Iโm not going to do any advertising for them for free but you know the commercials, so I just did. When people are hungry, theyโre not themselves. Weโre going to talk a lot more about that coming up right after this.
How would you like to really know what every body is saying? Understanding body language can help you in your career, your relationships, and in everyday interactions. Subscribe to the Deception Tips email on spencercoffman.com today.
Welcome back to Deception Tip episode number 91 where we are talking about hunger and the effect it has when people are telling lies. Usually, when someoneโs hungry, they are thinking about their hunger and when someone is lying, they are thinking about their lie.
Therefore, if you put those two combinations together, someone is lying and theyโre hungry, now theyโre thinking about all of the stress and tension involved in telling a lie.ย
Plus, theyโre thinking about hunger and eating and food and whatever they can do to satisfy that, so they have two competing desires. Usually, when the human brain has two competing desires, one is going to trump the other.
Generally, in this circumstance, hunger will probably trump their lie because the lie is not true, so itโs not that important. However, if theyโre fighting for truth, theyโre probably going to keep fighting for that truth and hunger isnโt going to matter to them. In this instance, when someone is lying, that hunger is going to overwhelm that lie.
Therefore, if you start asking them more and more questions when theyโre hungry when theyโre starting to become stressed, frustrated, and tense on top of the lie. So, thatโs even beyond telling the lie or the stress and tension involved in the lie, they will be more apt to tell you what you want to hear and what you want to know.
The reason is that that hunger and that thought of hunger and everything is going to overpower the lying tendencies and thoughts and behaviors because one will trump the other. They will start to be thinking more about food, and how they can get food. They realize that if they answer your questions and satisfy you, they can leave and go eat, or maybe youโve offered to get them a cheeseburger or something afterward.
Use that to your advantage, ask some questions but be on the lookout for answers that you want to hear or things they think youโre looking for because they may say anything in order to get food or get away from you. You have to sift out that too because there could be a lot of nonsense thrown in there.
If they are really hungry, they may just be telling you what you want to hear or what they think you want to hear, that way, they can get on with their lives and get some food. However, you should sift through that, youโre going to pay attention to all the different signs of deception that youโve learned. Youโll know whether or not theyโre lying even more or whether theyโve started to tell you the truth.
A lot of times when people are hungry they may slip up and theyโre going to just tell you the truth by accident. Itโll be more of they are telling their lie and then they get hungry and you keep asking them and theyโre going to tell you theyโre hungry or youโre going to know. Theyโre going to become a little bit more irritable and frustrated as weโve said before.
When youโre asking these questions, youโre going to notice that they may give a different response. Theyโre not intentionally giving a different response, this is a slip-up, itโs a contradiction. Youโre going to start watching for contradictory statements, gestures, behaviors, everything.
Chances are their first story is going to be one way and when they are hungry and youโre asking them again, that second story may be different. So, you need to find the holes between those stories, you need to find out where theyโve messed up and then youโre going to call them out on those specific instances.
When they explain those instances, you need to be watching very, very carefully for additional signs of deception. You want to establish a pattern and a cluster of behaviors in those little circumstances when theyโre explaining those loopholes because then you will be able to find the differences in their stories.
Youโll be able to call them out on those lies and then you will see whether or not their explanation is indeed true and where theyโre lying. Itโs a multifaceted strategy here, youโre going to talk to them, youโre going to talk to them again when theyโre hungry. You need to find the loopholes, the differences, youโre going to meticulously sift through and ask them specific questions about each spot.
This isnโt open-ended questions, itโs not โexplain this and thisโ, youโre going to start asking โyesโ and โnoโ questions because that is much easier for you to determine whether or not theyโre going to tell a lie. Remember a long time ago we talked about โYesโ and โNoโ and we said that a โyesโ or โnoโ question is simply that, the answer is โyesโ or โnoโ.
Therefore, if anyone explains anything then thatโs really weird because thereโs no reason to, itโs a โyesโ or โnoโ question, and the answer should be โyesโ or โnoโ. If they feel like they need to keep explaining, then something is definitely going on. That was episode 25, where we talked about โYesโ or โNoโ.
It is important to ask them these โyesโ or โnoโ questions because if they do try to explain stuff then youโll know that something more is going on. Maybe they just want to defend their position or give you more information and thatโs fine but in general, a โyesโ or โnoโ question should always be answered with โyesโ or โnoโ. Therefore, use them to your advantage when you start to pick apart these different holes in their stories.
Use the other strategies and tactics that you have learned throughout the Deception Tips podcast. Things like Relating Language and making sure that you guys are on the same page or that they think they relate to you, now theyโre even more apt to open up, that was in episode 84.
Another good one that you could use or certain things like Rephrasing the Questions. If they ask you to rephrase your question or if they even rephrase the question themselves and then answer it, you know that thereโs something going on.ย
Itโs like a stalling tactic or a delaying tactic in their explanation, that was episode 64. Those different things that youโll be able to pick up on are important in this step because now youโve started to dig in a little bit deeper.
Another one would be Repeating the Question, which was episode 43. So, once you start to dig deeper, youโre peeling back the inner layers and they will start to exhibit a lot more of these signs because they may not know what youโre doing or they may not know why youโre doing it. Remember, theyโre frustrated because theyโre hungry, so that adds an entire level of extra stuff that you can use to your advantage.
So, I want to thank you for listening to this weekโs episode of the deception tips podcast. I hope that youโll share it with your friends, subscribe to the feed, check out the Deception Tips videos, the blog and take a look at the books I have available, and, as always, tune in next week for a new deception tip.
Video Transcript
Hey guys, my name is Spencer Coffman, thank you for watching theย deception tips videos. Theyโre all about teaching you how to read people and detect deception so that youโll be able to tell if someone is lying to you. Today, weโre going to talk about a technique that you can use, itโs more of a state of being that you can use to get the truth out of someone.
Itโs not your state of being, itโs someone elseโs, itโs a technique thatโs been used for ages, cops use it all the time, police officers, law enforcement personnel. It could be a little controversial because youโre playing on something that someone else canโt really help, itโs like a predator going after the prey. Itโs a technique that you can use and feel free to use it because if someone is lying, you need the truth.
So, here it is, this is Deception Tip number 91. Ask for information when people are hungry. Hunger can lead to impatience and impulsive responses which may be more truthful. As I said, this is taking advantage of a certain position that someone is in, so it is a little bit controversial. However, lying is wrong, so if someone is lying and you use a little controversy to get the truth, what are you going to do?
So, hunger can lead to impatience and more impulsive responses. Why? It is because people are hungry, youโre not you when youโre hungry. Oftentimes though, so this is a little bit of a warning as people can get angry when theyโre hungry or irritated, more irritable anger so watch for that. Sometimes their responses and impulsivity may just be in that anger because theyโre hungry.
Itโs also a good thing to watch for if all of a sudden, like if you have kids and you notice they might be getting a little cranky, maybe theyโre hungry, you never know. So, find that out, itโs just like a little tip that you can use in your relationships and your family that maybe someone is hungry, so solve that problem first and move on.
Also, itโs very important that if people are getting a little bit impulsive or impatient and theyโre giving you quick answers, it may not be because theyโre lying, it may simply be because theyโre hungry. So, you need to make sure that when you are talking to someone that if youโre trying to find the truth, you can use their hunger as an advantage to get them a little more irritated or a little more tension bubbling up inside of them.
When theyโre lying, theyโre already stressed and tense and when theyโre hungry, now theyโre going to be stressed and tense even more. So, use that to your advantage when you are speaking with them if in fact that hunger is a part of the conversation. Thatโs important because, as I said, keep in mind, they are lying, so youโre not really doing something thatโs pushing beyond the limits.
However, sometimes in police interrogations, you see this in movies or even in real-life cases where the police officers are interrogating the suspect for hours on end. After 13 hours or 15 hours or however long that theyโve had them sitting in that little room, they havenโt had anything to drink. They havenโt had anything to eat, theyโre so hungry, theyโre so tired, theyโre so thirsty and the police officers use it as an advantage.
Well, if you confess, weโll get you something to eat or you confess weโll get you some water. Then eventually the person does and then they serve them. Well, now itโs been taken too far. So, itโs one thing to use it to your advantage, to get a response, itโs another to make it your advantage and thatโs the difference right there.
So, if this is your first time watching these videos, Iโd love to have youย subscribe to the channel on YouTube. Feel free to comment with any questions you may have. Also, if youโd like some more information,ย we have books,ย podcasts, andย blog postsย all available onย spencercoffman.comย that are dedicated to teaching you exactly what every body is really saying.
Until next time.